I lay here listening to the sounds all around me
I am filled with warmth
I feel so safe and secure
All of my needs are being met
I am cared for by this lady that I've never met...
a lady that I've heard others call "my mom"
I'm not exactly sure what a "mom" is but I know it must be something special
'cause she is the one who cares for me
I don't really have much to do except lie here
and grow bigger and stronger with each passing day
I fill my time by dreaming
Dreaming of all the things that I want to be (or do) when I grow up
I dream of my family and all the fun things we will do
I dream of my "mom and dad" and how much they will love me just as I already love them
I dream of growing up surrounded by friends and family,
laughing and playing together daily
I dream of what I want to be when I am all grown up...
Maybe a doctor..maybe a scientist...maybe the president...
maybe a preacher or astronaut or such...
So many choices to make
So many dreams to dream
I give my "mom" a little nudge to remind her I am still here
I feel the pressure answer me.
She's pushing back
I guess that means she's saying HI.
Suddenly, my peaceful dreams are shattered!!!
The warmth that once surrounded me is being drained away.
I'm getting cold.
"Mommy, what's happening to me?Please help me feel safe again"
The quiet is replaced by such a horrific noise
A noise so deafening I cannot even think
"I'm so very scared mommy. Please make it go away
PAIN! PAIN! PAIN!
Mommy, make them stop..
It hurts so bad...
Can't you hear me screaming?
Where have you gone?
What have I done to make you stop loving me?"
Wait - I think I see a light.
Could it mean that you have come to stop all of this hurt?
No, No, it can't be true...
I hear a voice and it is telling you to relax, it's almost over.
Are you really going to let them do this to me?
Why? What have I done to you?
The reprieve from pain is over now
They're back again for me
But this time they've brought a friend
It's big, it's sharp, it's oh so very shiny
And now it's coming straight at me
Make it stop! Take it away!
Can't you see what this is doing to me?
I feel nothing now except for the pain
My body is being torn from limb to limb
I can see all of my dreams go up in smoke
With each infliction from that shiny thing I can feel even more pain
My life is over before I even had a chance to live
But before I go, please tell me this -
Mommy, what did I ever do to make you hate me so?
I feel my life being ripped away
I don't think that I can bear much more of this pain -
Please make it go away!
I cry, I scream, I kick and I fight -
always pleading with you for a chance at life
You never reply - you don't make them stop
What once were dreams that I hoped to share with you
are now shattered and scattered amongst my limbs -
discarded as if they never mattered
The pain is unbearable but what hurts the most
is knowing that I was never loved by you
Now, thanks to you I will never know how it feels to be loved at all
Amidst the pain and my pleas for help
I hear a voice calling out to me...
"My precious child...Do not fear...You mean the world to me..
No matter that she meant your death for evil...
I will show you that you are good...
Reach out your arms and come to Me...
I loved you before you were formed and I will love you for all eternity...
Come to me and heaven is yours...
From all of the pain I will set you free"
In the instant that I reached out my arms to Him,
I heard the doctor say "At last, it's done..You can go home soon..
No longer do you have a son..."
I should be sad. I should be hurt
My "mom" she seemed so glad
But none of it mattered to me anymore
This man in whose arms I was wrapped - was holding me tight
His voice was so sweet
His touch was so gentle
His words were so comforting
No more pain did I feel
No more tears did I cry
For this kind, gentle soul placed His hand around mine
He leaned down and He whispered so softly into my ear
"My precious son...no longer do you need to fear...
You are finally at home in this palce I call Heaven...
I love you my child and I always will...
My name is God, but you, my son can call me Abba -
Your Father - from this moment on forward"
I watched and I smiled as he picked up the pieces of my shattered dreams
He put them together and formed a new picture that He showed to me...
a picture of He and I - arm in arm that He called "My Family"
I never thought that I would live to see this day
and I don't think that you expected it either
But your plans for me, they backfired
For today I have been "born" into a different life -
a life for all eternity
No tears, no pain, just love all the time
Mommy, I leave you with one final thought...
Please don't let me have died in vain
Do all you can to spread my story to others far and wide
Become a champion for my cause
Help make "abortion = homicide"